Anger management – How can I control my anger and frustration?


If you are reading this because you would like to understand what anger is and how it works and more importantly, how you can manage anger, I am glad you are addressing this challenge. The first step towards addressing anger is acceptance and not living in denial of it.

As we are here on the topic, we need to clearly establish that anger and stress are more to do with management than with controlling. Yes, you will feel angry, you will feel like screaming it out, you will have an anger outburst. So don’t ask yourself how to control it. Ask yourself, “Is this a situation I can manage?”


1. Address the ‘Why’

The minute you get angry, pause, take a time out and ask yourself why this is making you angry. Is it the person? Is it the situation? Do you feel helpless or angry? Prompting these questions will add rationality to your situation. Rather than addressing anger at a surface level, introspect on why you are feeling what you are feeling. It is not about controlling anger, it is about understanding it.


2. Implement techniques

 Anger is most times situational and it is one or a few moments that you need to manage. In situations like these, techniques like counting down from 10, taking deep breaths, just stop talking and pausing, taking a short walk, listen to calming music. These anger management techniques can be handy in workplaces or in events, family gatherings, or simply with family and friends. Understand ways to manage stress than trying to escape it.


3. Talk about it

 If you are feeling angry right now, talk about it to the one causing it. But also remember, anger is a reaction and it is you who reacts. But effective communication can lead to a better situation and can actually turn into a positive situation. This is also an effective technique for stress management at the workplace.


4. Get a coach

 If you think you have anger management issues if you want to know ways to manage stress, get a coach who can help you address anger and stress. You will understand how one can lead to another and how you can break the vicious circle of stress due to anger and anger due to stress. Controlling anger could sometimes backfire or you may bottle up and one day have an anger outburst. This is why you need to learn how to release it out, vent it out, and let go.